Guess Who's Bizack?

"Guess who's bizack. You still smellin' crack in my clothes. Don't make me have to relapse on these hoes. I'm out here to grind mo' rapped up in the paper chase. I wanna fuck a fine hoe and Candy Paint the '88."

So what? You got a problem? I've been busy. Leave me the eff alone. DirectTV's Masters MegaMix and masters.org offering free online streams. The NHL playoffs starting and Sean Avery doin' work. Watching six baseball games at a time everyday. Gambling profusely. Watching the closing of the NBA season and the beginning of the playoffs. Chris Paul! Spring football. Catching bullpen sessions and sitting in the infield for another long, hot, and boring inning for the Pickles defense. Getting drunk and seeing what kind of dirty things these wildebeests will let me do to them. Getting a fade at the barber shop a la Johnny Starks '92. I might have even fell off the wagon and Rasheed Wallaced a few blunts in the past few weeks. And to top all of that off, apparently, I got arrested or something like that (That's not really me). What happens when all of this hits at the same time? Your blog suffers. And so do the readers. For that I apologize, but I'm still going to choose vajjggg over this shtuff every day of the week.

I Was Going To Graduate This Semester, but Then I Failed Film Class...and Life - We Failed at That Too

I know I almost failed "Music, Society, and Culture" my senior year, but holy geez.



"Smith sending in Obrzut, Pick and Rollin like we drew it!!! Pass the ball to Crawford, and get the Slam Dunk!!!!" Wow, you spit hot fire.

Lazy Tuesday?...more like Lazy Schoolwork. No I will not make out with you. Did ya hear that? This girl wants to make out with me in the middle of class. You got Kentucky Basketball Kids up there talking about God knows what and all she can talk about is making out with me. I'm here to learn, everybody, not to make out with you. Go on with the Kentucky Bas-KITT-ball.

Tim Floyd, Is There No Limit? This Story Makes Me Say Ugghhh

Finding a replacement for OJ Mayo. No problem. Just holler at Master P if you hear him. He's got the hook up. Lil' Romeo's best friend is the No. 5 ranked basketball prospect and top-ranked small forward in the country. And Lil' Romeo wants to go to USC's prestigious film school. Oh...and he wants to ball too. On scholarship. Even though he is not that good. And has a bum knee. What's that Tim Floyd? You are actually recruiting me? An offer? Well no one else was dumb enough...I mean, sure. It was that easy? So, your walk-ons aren't going to get mad or anything are they? Sorry John Bender. Looks like you'll have to wait another year. But hey, keep up the hustle in practice. We need you on scout team, giving your blood and sweat every day, getting abused by Mayo and Taj Gibson - helping them become NBA lottery picks. So what you have to pay $44,000 a year when your family only makes $60,000.

Tajuan Porter and Darren Collison, you guys better watch out. Lil' Romeo is so gonna shut you down next year. Oh, he's not going to play? Wait, so why...why is he getting a scholarship? "We may have more 11- to 17-year-old girls in the stands than we've had in the past," said Floyd. Ohh, I get it. But you like them that young, Mr. Floyd? I mean 17, sure, but come on?

Friday's Lunch Special...Cadillac Pimpin'

Gotta keep the sponsors happy.

Debbie Clemens Is A Cheater

Congress is disgracing our great nation with this nonsense.


Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrr...Why did you inject my wife with HGH? I was not at the Canseco party. I'll kill you!

In the meantime...

* The Twins signed Livan Hernandez to a one-year, $5 million contract. National League pitchers can now sleep at night.

* Craig Biggio was hired by the Astros to serve as "a special assistant to general manager Ed Wade, a similar role held by Jeff Bagwell." Awwww...Bigg <3's Bags. They can't quit each other.

* Kevin Mench went back to the Rangers, agreeing to a minor league contract. The Dallas Morning News reports, "the Rangers are in a reunion kind of mood. A week after bringing back Nolan Ryan, the club decided to reunite with Kevin Mench as well." My god, that is some terrible journalism. Here is what happened when Nolan Ryan heard he had just been mentioned in the same sentence as Kevin Mench.

* The Padres avoided arbitration with Khalil Greene and agreed to a two-year deal worth $11 million. It's too bad because here is what the arbitration hearing would have looked like.



* They found Lil Wayne's duffle bag. And it wasn't full of money this time.

* Scientists found a flying Dino-SAUR in China. Here's a photograph Captain Caveman took a few years back.

Update: Photo has been deleted. Here is an artists rendering via: AP. March 19 - 3:00 pm

* And here is some football news to help ease your shakes while you eagerly wait for the Combine. ProFantasySports.com looks at the top receivers and apparently, the Colt Brennan bashing has begun. Actually, Marcus Howard started that in New Orleans a little over a month ago.

What do Chris Berman and Project Pat Have in Common? Aunt Jemima Solves the Riddle

Updating My Previous Post: I'm Sorry, Bruce. These Boys Get That Syrup in 'Em, They Get All Antsy in Their Pantsy.

I just found this. Apparently Chris "Triple Deux" Berman loves Codeine as well. Da Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiders.



Be careful Boomer or else you may wind up next to DJ Screw and Pimp C...In the sand, like most of your golf shots this past weekend at the Pebble Beach Pro-Am. God, you were terrible...and sweaty!

Update: This video has been removed by ESPN, but trust me it was hilarious. It was about sneaking Tylenol with Codeine across the Canadian border. February, 13 - 11:30 am

Update: You can find the video and much more here. Thanks Deadspin. February 13 - 2:30 pm

I'm Sorry, Bruce. These Boys Get That Syrup in 'Em, They Get All Antsy in Their Pantsy

There is currently a drug epidemic in the United States that many people have absolutely no idea about. According to Wikipedia, the drug is known as Purple drank, but from my experiences it is best known as Sizzurp or Syrup. Liquid Friggin' Codeine. You are pro-BOB-ly asking yourself, "How serious can this be?"

This is huge in the southern rap scene, especially in Houston where DJ Screw was known for two things. The first was slowing down tracks of a cut when he was mixing them. Anyone who knows about Three Six Mafia knows what I am talking about. And if you don't know about the Triple Six ummm...killa's, then you need to do some research. I mean, we have been bumpin that shit since middle school around here. No 8th Grade party was complete without some 3-6. The next was that...dat Syrup.

Anyway, DJ Screw, UGK (Pimp C and Bun B), Three Six, Z-Ro, Project Pat, Lil Wayne, etc. started rapping about Sippin on that Sizzurp. And then people who listened to this stuff, began trying to get their hands on liquid codeine. And I guess, they began realizing that it isn't really that difficult to do. God knows I have seen my fair share of this stuff. If I were a real journalist, I would probably attempt to write a story about this because anyone outside of this particular music scene is most likely unaware of the severity of the problem.


DJ Screw, the so called originator of the "purple scene," died from a codeine overdose in 2000 after releasing discs and mix-tapes with classic titles such as "Codeine Fiend," "Sippin' Codeine," and "Syrup Sippers." Then Big Moe, creator of classic CD's "City of Syrup" and "Purple World" died of an overdose in October of 2007. And on December 4, 2007, everyone's favorite Pimp...C, was found dead in a West Hollywood hotel. I'll give you one guess how he died.

Naturally, my first question is how much of this shit do you have to consume before Barney starts singing Enter Sandman and you are comatose? I always knew what Lil Wayne was talking about when he said he liked his Sprite Easter pink. But just look at these retards making "Lean." Are these guys drinking this shit nonstop like that one annoying guy who carries his water bottle around all day? Wake up. Drink some Sprite. Take shower. Drink more Sprite. Go to Work. Smoke Blunt. Check Blackberry. Drink more Sprite. Pass out. Never wake up again. Sounds fun.

In 2006, Terrence Kiel, who at the time was the San Diego Chargers starting safety, was arrested at the team facility for felony possession of codeine-based cough syrup with the intent to distribute. Kiel is from Texas and played at Texas A&M and was also tryin' to make that lean.

In case you are wondering here is the recipe...

"-Promethazine w/Codeine VC <- Sizzurp (active ingredient)
-Original Sprite Soda <- Mixing ingredient (although different flavors of sprite are now used, such as sprite remix)
-Jolly rancher candy <- Flavor additive"

I don't really have much to add to this issue other than that this shit is ridiculous and I thought that I should at least let people know what is going on in the world today or else you will keep walking around with a blind eye...Looking both ways before you cross the street, drinking your Starbuck's mocha-fagga-lotta, reading the New York Times, and failing to see what the hell is really going on in the world. Unless, of course, you watch Fox News because they report and you decide.

Bun
Uploaded by skaybn

Only 3 Weeks - 21 Days Till...

Pitchers and Catchers Report.

Meanwhile, the Joker danced with the Devil for real and Gibril and the G-Men are playing the Patriots in Super Bowl XLII. Here's some stuff to do instead of - or in between watching the Australian Open, old Fresh Prince episodes, and Super Bowl XXXII (or in my case XXV over and over again) highlights...


* This shtuff from Kissing Suzy Kolber is hitlarjewous.

- 16-0..."Why don’t you go snort some cocaine and drive your car into a telephone pole, you stupid daaaaaa-kie!"

- 17-0..."So fack you, Jagwuhs. Or Jagwiuhs. Or whatever kinda fackin' jungle animal you ahhhh!"

- Super Bowl..."Tommy Brady's droppin tha Hulk Hogan big boot..."

* Go Here (AdultSwim.com) and search for "Carl" or "I'm pissed."

* My boy over at A Tasty Pint has something for all you Cabbagetown Crack Whore lovin' hipsters.

* Ever wonder another name for the E-Brake or Handbrake Turn?

* And here are two videos my sponsor Cadillac has donated for all my thugsta's out there...



"True to the gizzame, stopped in the projects - sold a half an ounce of cocaine. Hit interstate ten, to Texas. Listening to DJ Screw just raised the Lexus. Called up Pimp C..."



"Country Ass Boy. Country like LeAnn Rimes. Mississippi David Banner and Lil Weezyana."