Friday, February 29, 2008

Say It Ain't So...The Gibril Wilson Sweepstakes Begins Today. And Jeff Garcia Has a New "Partner"


Today is the first day for NFL teams to sign free agents and Gibril Wilson is currently taking calls from potential suitors. The NY Post claims the Giants are preparing for Wilson's departure. We here at CPC would be devastated if Gibril goes elsewhere. Here is what else has happened so far.

* After the Jets granted Jonathan Vilma the right to seek a trade to anyone but the Patriots, the Saints pounced and traded an undisclosed draft pick for the former Pro-Bowl linebacker.

* Jerry Porter finally walked the plank and got the hell out of Oak-town signing a six-year, $30 million contract with Jacksonville. The Jaguars also swapped a sixth round draft pick with the Vikings in exchange for speedy receiver Troy Williamson.

* The Bills signed LB Kawika Mitchell fresh off a Super Bowl season with the Giants. Candy Painted Cadillacs and Giants fans everywhere wish you the best of luck. Lots of late-night bowling and ugly girls up there in Buffalo.

* The Cleveland Browns re-signed Derek Anderson to a three-year deal worth between $24 million to $26 million. I guess Brady Quinn will continue to have plenty of time to make terrible commercials and go out and get in drunken confrontations with the gays of Columbus.

* The Bengals must miss Bid Daddy Dan Wilkinson because they traded a third and a fifth-round pick to acquire 340 pound raw-meat eating Shaun Rogers from the Lions. They also reached a three-year agreement with linebacker and bow-tie enthusiast Dhani Jones.

* A kicker retired. Hey Morten Anderson, did you hear that? A kicker retired.

* The Falcons re-signed...hahahaha...re-signed Chris Redman. Hahahahaha. DJ Shockley threw a party when he heard this news.

* Tedy Bruschi's heart, or what's still left of it, is still in New England and he decided to sign a multiyear contract with the Pats.

* The Bucs made former Saint Jeff Faine the highest paid Center in football. Does he know who their quarterback is? Faine is praying the Bucs will run a 90% shotgun orientated offense. Do you really want Jeff Garcia's hands on your junk 75 times every Sunday? And what about practice? Garcia usually asks to take extra snaps after everyone else has left the practice field, so beware Faine. Guard your Faint. Guard your Faint.

* Asante Samuel visited with the last-place Eagles. Santa Claus immediately called and warned Asante he had better be worth the $10 million a year that he is asking for.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Asante????Championship

Red Dastard said...

Isaac Bruce is a 49er...Championship???